Parenting - Finding a Balance

I still haven't found a balance. I'm constantly searching, but I'm still looking. This week, my two year old threw some really serious tantrums. She was screaming, she was lying down on the floor and kicking, she throws crayons, books, food, clothes toys, you name it. i often wonder what I was like at 2. Probably the same. Every night I pray for patience and guidance. I am a single mother, it's all upto me. I thank God, because my patience is strong. Yes, I have my moments of sheer frustration. Luckily, I have some tools:

1.) I have my breath. I can always take long, slow deep breaths. As I breath in, I think "in with the positive." As I exhale, I think "out with the negative." This helps me a great deal and I can't do it anywhere.

2.) The second thing I do when I need to destress is walking. It's winter here in Vancouver, so I bundle me and my daughter up, I put her in the stroller with some snacks and we head out for a walk. I walk off the stress, we both get some fresh air and a change of scenery and return feeling calm and content.

3.)The third thing I do to relieve stress is call another mom freind when my daughter is sleeping. By the end of the day, we both have some story to share about our days as mothers. After we vent, we somehow seem to be able to put a humorous spin on the days events. Laughing with a freind really helps.

I absolutley love being a Mother, but holy cow, it is strenuous and challenging at times. I want to send a shout out to all the moms out there, you're amazing and wonderful. Give yourself credit. We have an important role in this world.

Olivia's Beautiful Smile!

A Valuable Lesson in Parenting

A few days ago, I wrote an article expressing my frustration with my daughter's irratabilty, tantrums and lack of desire to nap. I was so annoyed
and worn out. Later that day, a friend and fellow mother, told me that my daughter was teething; she was getting her second year molars. Once she told me this, my daughter's behaviours made more sense to me. I felt bad that I had I had been so impatient and so insistent that she take her nap. I've been thinking about this for the last couple days and reslised that the real error I made was in being too rigid about our routine. My daughter is normally great about taking her naps. Would the world end if she didn't take her nap? Absolutely not! Was she being defiant? No! Structure and routine are great, but flexibilty is also important. Even though we had a dificult day, I learned a valuable lesson - be flexible!

Second Year Molars - A Dificult Day for Olivia and Mommy - Teething Woes

Today was a difficult day. I had decided, early morning, that I would take the day to get organized for the coming week. As a mother, there are countless preparations to make to help the week run smoothly. There is laundry to do, garbage and recycling to take out, meals to prepare, outfits to choose, a house to clean, appointments to mark on the calendar, activities to plan and phone calls to catch up on. Olivia was having none of this. She was cranky, restless, demanding, throwing toys, chucking her soother and asking for food then not eating eat it. She wouldn't go down for her nap, which was very unusual. I was beyond frustrated. I felt like we weren't connecting or working together at all. We were both feeling frustrated. My plans to get organized were rail roaded. I called a good friend and neighbour and asked if Olivia could spend a bit of time at her house so that I could get refocused and possible get dinner started. I explained that I needed a breather. She was understanding and told me to take the time that I needed. I was very grateful. Olivia went over and watched part of a movie. She was calm and relaxed. I suppose she needed a break from me too. After preparing dinner and fruit smoothies for the morning, I went to pick up Olivia. Olivia seemed tired and I noticed that her cheeks were rosy. My friend, who has a six year old, explained that my daughter was teething. Apparently, children get second year molars. I did not know this. So, like I often do when I'm not sure about something, I looked on line fore information on second year molars. I found a website called :

http://www.thenewparentsguide.com/baby-teething.htm, which provided a complete baby/teething chart:


Age Teeth Position:


6 to 7 months Incisors Two central bottom & Two central top teeth.
7 to 9 months Two more incisors Top & bottom; making four top & four bottom teeth in all.
10 to 14 months First molars Double teeth for chewing
15 to 18 months Canines The pointed teeth or “fangs”
2 to 3 years Second molars The second set of double teeth at the back


Again, as a refresher, the teething symptoms include irritability, drooling, coughing, biting and gnawing, not sleeping well, and cold like symptoms.


I've read on a few parenting message boards that it can take anywhere from days, weeks even as long as six months for the second year molars to come in.


So how can I help my daughter through this process?


Olivia has been asking me for yogurt and cold applesauce a lot lately, which makes sense because they are cold and likely soothe her gums.

I went to http://www.mamapedia.com, a website where other mother’s ask questions and can post comments and their experiences. Other mother’s suggested cold cloths, juice Popsicles, Advil, soothing music, Hyland’s Homeopathic teething tablets, and baby OraGel. I will try my best to be sympathetic. I know how painful a toothache can be. I will try as many strategies as I can to soothe her gums.

I have found different phases of parenting to be more stressful than others. Sometimes I feel like when I think I finally have the hang of things, a new phase arrives and I’m thrown for a curveball. On top of everything, I am a single mother. I’ve become better at asking for help from friends, family and Olivia’s daycare provider. I’m new to parenting and I’m learning as I go. Mother’s we need to be gentle with ourselves. It’s ok if we don’t know everything.

Part of taking care of myself as a Mother includes exercise. The benefits of exercise are countless. For me, the primary function of exercise at this point of my life is to reduce stress and to boost my energy levels. Tomorrow morning, I plan to go for an Oceanside run to clear my head, let go of the tension and get energized for the coming week.

Have a great week fellow Mommy's!